Are Sober Women Becoming More God-Curious?
Are Sober Women Becoming More God-Curious?
Here's what is true for me.
In a recent episode over on the podcast, I decided to chat about how my sober journey has led me to becoming more God-Curious. Lately, and especially over on the podcast if you've been listening, I’ve been having some amazing conversations with some sober women in my life. We typically hit on all things sobriety, but recently we really started digging into religion.
One of my amazing mentors, and new dear friend (you know who you are), and I have been getting really deep into this topic. We’ve noticed this growing similarity we’re seeing in the sober curious movement and this new (for some of us) God-curious movement. I've tried my best to break it down a bit and give you some examples of what I mean.
Here are 5 ways I believe that our sober journey is so similar to our new, God-curious journey:
Community. This one was pretty obvious for me, but both are two beautiful, loving communities. When I first was very new to the alcohol-free world, the sober community welcomed me with open arms. There was never any judgement, no-one telling me I was doing this sober thing the wrong way, just love and compassion. I've been gifted some of the most incredible, strong, meaningful relationships that were born within the sober community. I’m seeing the same similar qualities so far in the Christian community. The Christian women I’ve been working alongside the last 90 days never judged me for being a total newbie. They were welcoming, encouraging, and always said how excited they were for me to be walking down this new path. And I gotta be honest… in a time when the world seems to be filled with pure craziness everywhere you look, what’s so wrong with trying to focus on something like spirituality and God? Something that could bring you joy, remind you of the important things in life, and make you feel like you’re part of something bigger than you ever imagined. That's the kind of community I'd like to be a part of.
Labels. In my experience, I believe that labels can do more harm than good sometimes. For a lot of us, we never identified as an alcoholic, an addict, and/or as someone who had a so-called rock bottom. Heck, even the word "sober" occasionally made us uncomfortable. Unfortunately, sometimes the fear of these words, or labels, keep us in this gray area for longer than we'd like. They prevent us from finally removing alcohol and keep us in that vicious cycle of 'healthy by day' to 'wine-o by night'. It’s a shame that these words can have such a negative impact on our mindset. As of late, I truly believe that for me personally, I see a lot of these similarities in my God-curious journey. For a long time I was too nervous to even use the word God. Instead I'd say "the universe" or something else kind of woo-woo. Religion seemed tricky and was a subject that made me uncomfortable. It was uncomfortable because it was intimidating. I was scared if I tried to have a conversation about God with someone I would say the wrong thing, pronounce something wrong, offend someone, and well, kinda make a fool of myself. This is so similar to the fear I had in regards to what people would think if I said I was sober. As I get older though, and ESPECIALLY now that I’m sober, I'm slowly caring less and less of what people think of. Hence the reason I’m getting more confident in talking about my faith. I’m getting more comfortable saying the word “God” (as ridiculous as that sounds) and I’m noticing that the conversations I used to avoid are becoming easier, more enlightening, and definitely more meaningful.
Routine is everything. When I was first exploring a sober lifestyle, those first few weeks, heck MONTHS, were all about sticking to a routine. I remember learning to watercolor, mixing mocktails, logging my dry days, and connecting with my sober friends for daily accountability. That was my personal recipe for success in my sober journey. What I’m noticing in my God-curious journey, is that routine has once again become crucial. My current routine looks like this: I wake up in the morning, read a couple chapters, listen to the Bible Recap podcast so I can review what I just read (side note, I adore you Tara Leigh Cobble and your podcast is AMAZING). Next, I follow that with a text to my Dad. I let him know what my morning takeaway was. This is also my perfect opportunity to ask him alllllll the questions I’m too embarrassed to ask others. Such as; What is a Gospel? Hold up, explain to me who God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit are exactly. What’s the difference between a disciple and an apostle? When people reference a verse and say for example, Matthew and some numbers with a colon between them, what the heck does that mean? Pro tip: Find someone you can ask questions, even the questions you think are utterly ridiculous, and make sure it's someone who will hear you and not judge you. P.S. Thanks for helping me with this Dad, you’re simply the best.
Inspiration. One thing I always like to remind people who are exploring an alcohol-free life, is that they have no idea how many people they are inspiring by simply not drinking. True story! When we see people who are happy, healthy, and who are genuinely working hard to live their best life, we become inspired and want to do the same thing. And what I’m slowly noticing, is a lot of women (especially women in their late 30s / early 40s - like yours truly) are at a point in their life where they’re really evaluating all the things. I was inspired to remove alcohol and now I’m inspired to make God a part of my life. It’s an exciting time for me and I can’t help but think that perhaps, maybe just one person who is reading this right now, might be inspired to look at their own spirituality.
Okay last but not least, I’ve gotta mention my WHY. My decision to live alcohol-free of course was for me, but the other ginormous reason was for my two amazing boys. They are everything to me and they deserve the absolute best version of me. I’m so thankful that by removing alcohol, they get a present, clear-minded, great mom that doesn’t miss a beat. They get to grow up knowing that alcohol isn’t self-care and that not everyone drinks. My decision to get God-curious is slowly but surely having the same positive impact. They see Mama reading the Bible, well shoot that’s a lie... I read in the morning while they’re sleeping, but they do see me wrap up my reading when they stumble out of their rooms first thing in the morning!! Haha! They’re about to start learning alongside with me if they’re open to it. And more than anything, I’m just excited that as I grow in my faith, I can continue to learn how to intentionally raise my boys into young men of character, honor, and strength... hopefully with God. Hey look, I said his name confidently and in probably the most beautiful way, right?
So there ya have it folks. This is where I’m at and I’m sticking to it! I firmly believe that just like we had this wave of people jumping on the sober train, we’ve got another train coming up the track. It’s the God train and people are buying their tickets to hop on. I mean can you blame them? We’re living in a world where a lot of us are searching for more peace, more love, and more purpose. Things I hope that these conversations bring to YOU.